Post-Therapy Thoughts

She is brave, but unfortunately, she forgets that.  Therapy is not for the meek and mild.  It’s not an easy process to share her deepest hurts as she reintroduces herself.  It’s not easy talking about her trauma, broken relationships, biggest regrets, and sex life.  It’s raw and painful and embarrassing and exhausting on so many levels.  It’s not easy when she has a new list of coping exercises to practice, new conversations she has to share with her husband.  And even though these things are good, it’s hard.  Really, really hard. 

So it’s okay that post-therapy is a day of fatigue.  It’s okay that she feels the weight of her bravery, the fall of her adrenaline.  It’s okay that she’s less emotionally available for those she loves for a day.  It’s okay.  

What’s even better is that she gets to come home to the safest place she’s ever known.  She gets to greet the love of her life and watch him scoop up their little girl, tickling her until she giggles.  She gets to quietly lay on the floor as their baby plays with stuffies.  And when she feels all but spent, she can rest her heart and mind while daddy and daughter finish up the day. 

She is tremendously loved and supported. She is healing and communicating better day by day.  She is bold and capable and bright and beautiful.  She is a gem of a human.  

So ya, it’s okay that she feels utterly exhausted.  She put in more emotional work within an hour than most people do in a week, even a month.  It’s okay that the love she gives her family today is limp and consistent rather than spunky and loud. It’s okay that she needed a few hours to recover.  It’s okay that today was a hard, but good day.